There's a Song In My Heart

Lyrically speaking, life can be challenging Antoinette,

It's  fat Tuesday tomorrow, or as the French say, Mardi Gras (Sounds slimmer). Your last chance to indulge in frivolous activities, bacchanalian festivities and deeds you won't want to confess before giving it all up on Ash Wednesday and the next 40 days of Lent. Indulge! Have a triple shot of that juice...One Bourbon, One Scotch and One Beer. Enjoy that Last Cigarette, the one before you go to bed. And if you're feeling gingerly, you haven't lived until you've had your tires rotated by a Red Headed Woman. Test the bed springs and rock me mama like a Wagon Wheel. Or maybe it was cold and lonely in the deep dark night and you got to see Paradise by the Dashboard Lights. Because you're the kind of person that believes in making out once, love'm and leave'm fast...in your Little Red Corvette. No worries Romeo and Juliet, at confession time with the girls on Wednesday, Juliet will just say "oh Romeo, yeah I used to have a scene with him"! One of the two good things about Lent is it gives you a hall pass from regrettable decisions on Mardi Gras. Sorry Romeo, Juliette gave up "fleeting romances" for the next 40 days. The other good thing is you only have to give up indulgences, sinfulness and excess. However, since man and wo-man need water for life, and Jesus turned water into wine for his first miracle, then wine is the Agua de Vida. Thus thou never hast to forgo wine (biblically speaking). So load up on your
favorite White, Rosè or Red, Red Wine...it'll make you feel so fine, keep you rocking all of the time. No matter whether you're over or under 40! (Think about it...😆) You don't have to be in Nawlins or Rio de Janeiro to celebrate the festivities. You can samba wherever you like until the sun begins to shine, then just make sure you're in that number When the Saints Come Marching In! Sing it Satchmo! Don't worry about that extra fat you picked up on Tuesday, you can work it off on Wednesday. It didn't get it's nickname for nothing. 😉 But don't be a Dromedary, be a Bactrian! You could use the exercise! Pour your favorite grape generously and enjoy your night like you had some Sympathy For The Devil just as every cop is a criminal, and all the sinners saints. Exit light, enter night, take my hand, we're off to never never land...Enter Sandman! And speaking of LaLa Land, Hollywood, when you wake up on Ash Wednesday, give up the Whine for 40 days, and pour yourself some Wine!

Wine isn't only Business!

Don't worry,  it's only business Antoinette,

Well America it's President's Day. Time to celebrate two men who MAG'd (made America Great)! The Father of our country, and the Savior of our country. Washington fathered the greatest country ever by stopping the British from treading on us, and Lincoln saved the greatest country ever by convincing the secessionists you can't nullify presidents you don't like or federal laws you don't want to follow...a house divided cannot stand. We are a shared union of differences. Find the things we can agree on...WINE...and drink to each other's success without enmity. Revenge may be a dish that tastes best served cold, but you know what's a better dish...a hot meal, a bottle of Duca di Salaparuta and a peace offering. So leave the guns and take the cannoli. Wine helps let the better angels of our nature prevail. Keep your friends close, and go ahead and bring your enemies closer. The party will be bigger and as long as there is plenty of vino, amity will reign and empathy will be shared. The good news is if you play your cards right, take advantage of President's Day Sales, and bring the right bottle of wine... you might even be able to make someone an offer they can't refuse and take it to the mattress! 😆 GW said to avoid all foreign entanglements, except beautiful Sicilians. Do better than Luca Brasi. Don't end up sleeping with fish. And don't pay for something which you can get from wine for a lot less... otherwise it's only business. 😉 Nobody wants to do business on a holiday or wedding day, or any Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday for that matter. But if you have to combine business with the pleasure of a celebration, then do like the great Presidents did and take it to the mattress. May your first child be a masculine child. It's a holiday... time to put the world away for a minute, pretend you don't live in it, and let the sunshine and wine wash your blues away! Happy PD!

Double Entendres are Infectious

Not Appropriate for All Ages, Antoinette,

Is your love infectious? Well VD is serious business. We are all aware how serious it can be if not dealt with properly and in time. It can ruin a relationship and that kind of carelessness leads to something nobody wants to endure...STD! Which of course means you will still be paying that bill months later. Your health should be important to you. Avoid the pain of failing to prepare for VD...take precautions. Stock up on the one cure-all with which even penicillin can't compare...Wine! As long as you have a bottle of something special stashed away...you're physical and mental well being is assured!! So don't let VD sneak up on you. Prepare ahead of time. Put on a jacket...(pause for effect)...then go outside in the wind and head to your favorite wine store. Buy a special bottle of Red for dinner, and something bubbly for the fun later. Your well being is protected as long as you have wine to share with that someone special. Sorry Charley, but you can even have tuna fish for dinner. Show your good taste, and buy some wine that tastes good. Today! Before Valentine's Day! You don't want to put off making dinner plans until the last second and end up eating at some unromantic place. Save the always delicious Applebee's for another time, and save the embarrassment of getting kicked out for fighting after some other occasion like a Nascar race. Escape the pratfalls of a guilty conscience and the expense of STD! Shopping 'Til Dropping for costly make up gifts is not a good way to make up for your lack of foresight and a stocked wine rack. It gets very expensive and has mixed results at best. Avoid turning your significant other into Al Capone and turning the day into another St Valentine's Day Massacre. Save your relationship, prevent bankruptcy, and enjoy a nice Bordeaux! It will surely lead to a happy ending. 😆 Follow the advice of noted couple's therapist, David Lee Roth, and give your special someone a shot of your love...love, love is the source of infection! (Euphemism for glass of wine in case you were wondering)

Barolos are red

Your Valentine will be blue

If you show up tomorrow

Without wine enough for two!

Happy VD! 😍😚😆😈😇

Hot Dog! Wine, Weiners and a Cold Shower!

Cleanliness is next to Godliness Antoinette,

What to drink about? What to drink about?  Well America sometimes the reason is obvious why we should pour a glass of wine. Celebrate some great occasion, or maybe commiserate over some bad tiding. Last year was easy...we had to endure the election cycle...always a reason to drink wine. Speaking personally, I don't need outside inspirations. The reason is always right in front of me. There's a full wine bottle...and here's an empty glass...correct the problem! I'm a problem solver, and I'm good at what I do. However, others are less about solving problems and more about celebrating so I'll give you two things we should be celebrating this week. The first one of course happened yesterday. A huuuuge event that to my way of thinking should happen more often than the first Sunday in February. If you missed the celebration yesterday then you have my permission to extend the party. That's right...National Shower With a Friend Day. Any excuse to go green and save water I always say. Some want to make America great, I want to make America clean! Of course baths are perfectly acceptable and easier to drink wine...you don't want to dilute the bubbly. I would also suggest you choose your friend carefully, or drink a lot of wine beforehand...not everyone looks like Tom and Giselle sans wine! It's also probably a good idea that your friend isn't "attached" to another friend...let's not complicate this too much. Once you've washed behind your ears, it's time to get out (the prune look is never good) and move on to the big event of the week...National Kraut and Frankfurter Week. Hot Dog! Nothing cries out for a glass of the good stuff more than a delicious weiner! Spice up your life. Get sloppy! Load that puppy up with the works. Share a bottle or two of Malbec, or maybe a German reisling...then jump back in the shower...you guys are gonna need to clean up!😆

And congrats to the Atlanta Falcons, I fell asleep in the 3rd quarter so I missed the end but I'm sure they had a fun night celebrating their first Super Bowl win! Just wake me up when it's all over, when I'm wiser and I'm older!