Spring is in the air

Time to say goodbye to the last snowflake Antoinette,

No I'm not talking about the snowflakes of the selective outrage, victimization, virtue signaling adults crying and looking to children for answers to serious social issues. Maybe I'm cynical🤔, but 99% of what I see in the form of outrage seems to be like the msm...a contrived selfie, Instagram, Snapchat moment worn like a fashion statement with as much thought.  It's the real world🌎. Children should be in school learning, reading books of depth and in safety. Adults should be leading, continue learning and showing the good sense that comes from education, experience and a strong moral foundation. Pointing out one tragedy because it fits a narrative, but ignoring others that are just too routine is juvenile... juveniles are allowed the excuse to express themselves in silly ways... adults shouldn't.  Children, march to a library and read books. Learn to think then speak. Adults, stop using Google and Wikipedia and the punny little memes you read on Facebook as your brain. So what's the answer? It's complicated, but a good place to start is in the "real world" of G.O.T.'s  Tyrian Lannister... drink wine, know things.🍷 It's springtime... otherwise known as global warming.  It's a good time for a fresh start and some Spring cleaning. Out with the bad, and in with the good.... wine🍾. No more of the frozen little crystals ruining our days and causing school cancellations. Besides, it's springbreak...when kids get to vacay at Disney, or better yet, on the southern beaches frolicking and enjoying themselves while waiting for the snowflakes to melt away.❄ The youngins will come back to school with a spring in their step and the adults will tackle work with the rejuvenating spring that warming air and a refreshing Rosé bring. It's spring, and the clock has changed so its time to spring forward into happier moods and escape the doldrums of winter. Count your blessings that you don't live in the Seven Kingdoms, and winter doesn't last years. Grapes 🍇don't grow in winter remember, so celebrate this annual tradition of climate change and stock the wine cellar with refreshing Pinot Noirs, tasty old vine Zins, bubbly bubbles and a good syrah from down under before winter gets to them. 🍷Get outside, take long walks near mountain springs then go home and test out your bed springs and enjoy what life has given you.😉🛏🙈 Spring is when babies are born, so celebrate new life, and the birthday of your number one son who just became a legal adult if it applies.😉🎉🎁🍾🎂 It's also a week to celebrate rebirth for believers and non. Let's resurrect our spirits and outlook and sense of union. The spring air will warm our outsides, and the drink of the gods and result of JC's first miracle will warm our insides. Hope springs eternal in spring which is why this is the start of baseball season⚾️. It's the season of optimism. If your glass is half-full keep pouring and fill it up. Remember, night leads to day, the clouds will part and Steen follows Spring so keep your head up, it'll be ok...
It's rainin' but there ain't a cloud in the sky
Musta been a tear from your eye
Everything'll be okay
Funny thought I felt a sweet summer breeze
Musta been you sighin' so deep
Don't worry we're gonna find a way
I'm waitin', waitin' on a sunny day
Gonna chase the clouds away
Waitin' on a sunny day

Red State, Blue State

It's maddening that spring comes in March in the form of snow Antoinette.

Well it's Monday, and chances are unless you're one of the 12 Loyola Ramblers🏀 you didn't wake up in the best of moods or conditions... and we all know nobody wants to wake up in a Blue State! 🤕There's a good chance many of you who are only Irish ☘one day a year are still feeling the effects of the weekend and are suffering from the dreaded double whammy of St Patrick's Day and Busted Bracket flu🤒. That's the feeling you get after spending the weekend befuddled, boozed up, buzzed, crocked, flushed, flying, fuddled, glazed, groggy, high, inebriated, juiced, laced, liquored up, lit, muddled, plastered, potted, sloshed, stewed, stoned, tanked, tight, tipsy, totaled, wasted or any of the other 3000 synonyms for drunk while looking at your bracket with more red X'S than your last English essay. If you're Irish you are probably ok because they know the cure for excessive alcohol is... you guessed it... more alcohol.🍺 But if not you'll need a reminder that the only 2 scientifically verifiable cures for a hangover are more alcohol (and 3 beef and bean burritos from 7/11), or a bottle of Advil and more alcohol. That's it! Now we all know we have to be careful what we put in our bodies... and Advil is a drug and its very important to pay attention to the RDA. You don't want to overdose. 🤔Instead you want to fill your body with something healthy and escape that Blue State. Follow the allegory of Loyola, who escaped their Blue State and shooting gallery of a city, Chicago, to cross the Red River into a Red State of fame and glory. Hair of the dog will put you on the right path as well, bring a smile to your face and wash away the bitter taste that you picked Virginia to win it all.🙉 The trick here for the healthy conscious is to choose the right beverage... which is of course the healthiest beverage known to mankind, or wo-mankind, or any other kind science(political) deems you to be...Red Wine!🍷 Time to pour yourself a healthy glass of that life giving, age defying, antioxidanting, resveratrol laden, beautifying, body enhancing, mind relaxing, love fortifying, speechifying, dementia preventing, slimifying elixir of the grape! 🍇The varietal is up to you. Don't argue... it's science. And those teetotalers, well they'll just have to suffer. When they wake up that's as good as they are gonna feel all day... the rest of us have a nice cabernet🍷 to look forward to drinking. Speaking of science and the vernal equinox(must have received a red X on my English essay for lack of segue's), tomorrow is the first day of spring so we can do exactly as much day drinking🌄 as night drinking🌃... symmetry!🥂 Of course it's also the first day of spring which is why the forecast is snow ❄for the next two days to help make this the 6th coldest march ever☃️... all because of one thing... global warming!🔥 But don't despair... have plenty of wine on hand 🍾to warm your cockles, or better yet, drink your wine and invite someone special over to warm your cockles, 🙈prepare for another week of March madness... don't worry you probably don't have anything left to lose so just root for the underdogs and drink plenty of wine. Remember this week is also the anniversary of the first rock concert ever, The Moondog Coronation Ball in Cleveland, so  soothe your Blackhearts and Jett over to a bar to watch the Sweet 16 in the Big Dance where they play rock and roll, because...
Next we were movin' on
....singin'
I love rock n' roll
So put another dime in the jukebox, baby
I love rock n' roll
So come an' take your time an' dance with me

Seventh Rock From the Sun

Which is worse Antoinette, ignorance or apathy...well I dont know and don't care.

Ok, enough crying about losing an hour of sleep this weekend. The good news is you now get more time for day drinking and you get a week with so many good reasons to drink, the H will never get between W and ine again. It's also a good week for everyone to join together as one, and celebrate all the good things we have. So in honor of the anniversary of FDR's first fireside chat, pour yourself a nice cabernet, get comfortable, and listen while I chat with you on the the many reasons to drink wine this week. First, the Anschluss! Hold on... put your Twitter finger back in its holster. I'm not proposing a 4th Reich or the annexation of Austria again...its just time to take this word back from the negativity. Since it means joining, how about we unite on things we can agree on...wine and sports. We may like different varietals and teams but we agree on the concept of both so March Madness🏀 is a good time for an American Anschluss... and if you don't like sports (huh?)🙉 You can put on Sound of Music instead and sing along. More importantly, if you haven't done well on your bracket picks in the past... meaning you don't know your arse from your elbow, I suggest pouring a large glass of wine because if you drink wine you'll know things, and be like William Hershel who in 1781 on the first day of the tournament, discovered Uranus 🌕🙊and hasn't missed a pick since.⛹️‍♂️ (Is it just me or are planet jokes the best? ) 🤔This of course brings us to Wednesday, better known as Hump Day🐫, but probably should be called Big Bang Day🛏🚀🌋 this week... you may want to pour yourself another glass! 🍷This Wednesday marks the birthday of Al Einstein... noted big banger, bomb maker 💣and wine drinker. He wasn't called Weinstein for nothing! Then of course it's Toga Party Thursday...time to join with your friends and celebrate the Ides of March... be careful who you invite though, if Brutus 🗡and the boys come it might turn into an Animal House...toga, toga, toga! Then of course we get to TGIF Day, which falls on Jimmy "mad dog" Madison Day this week. 🎉The father of the constitution, 4th Prez, and Cab Franc drinker, who gave us the right to say what we want, shoot guns when we want, pray how we want and drink wine when want...apparently he also liked to play with a particular Dolly!😉 🙈And finally, Saturday brings us the Irish Anschluss, the day when everyone's a little Irish to celebrate what makes Ireland great... green beer🍺, funny hats and limericks☘. Leave the green beer for the college students, and pour yourself a Guinness... even the wine gods go Irish on St Patrick's Day. Break out your best limericks then gather around the jukebox and put The Who on first, 😉and remember...

Do you really think I care
What you eat or what you wear
Won't you join together with the band
There's a million ways to laugh
Ev'ry one's a path
Come on and join together with the band

And a few original limericks:

There once was a Roman Emporer
Who angered the Senate as a temperer
But Brutus wanted wine
So the senate stood in line
And committed a slight little misdemeanor

Once again it's time for March madness
But my picks usually end in great sadness
So this year I'll wine
On all the varietals of the vine
And relish in my own sense of badness 

There once was a lad from nantucket
Who passed out drinking wine from a bucket
His shillelagh was uncovered
When he awoke and he wondered
Me too? Or did I forget that I got lucket

Gone with the Wind

I don't think we're in Kansas anymore Antoinette.

March winds blow hard🌬...no I'm not talking about the Oscars...I don't watch awards shows as a rule, but can imagine that the wind storm on the left coast in La La Land (see i told you I wasn't talking about the Oscars, 🙊) last night would make this weekend's nor'easter on the right coast seem like a gentle breeze.  Hopefully, they didn't mess up the envelopes this year and kept the hysterical rants to a minimum. However, I did hear that a "remake" of Creature from the Black Lagoon won best picture, and in typical Hollywood fashion, had the obligatory sex scene...between a human and an underwater creature🙈...I always thought it was a bad thing when in the Godfather they said Luca Brasi "sleeps with the fish" but maybe I misunderestimated 🐠. I will say though this takes kissing frogs to find your prince to a whole new level🐸👑. I just hope she wasn't pressured into it...not that any guy would ever use a line like "you ain't livin', until you sleep with an amphibian" to get what he wanted...#metoo. 😉🛏 🦎 I do know that if you want to control The Shape of Water, you should fill the ice tray with some, but use most of it to mix with the fruit of the vine and then shape it with a wine bottle. I've often shared with you the benefits of wine to your well being...after all they don't warn you not to drink wine when you go south of the border, only water. And since we all know you can't believe what they tell you in Hollyweird, you better get your science from me, because while the drama kids were playing fantasy land, I was working on my science project about the many healthful benefits of drinking wine...it's the project that won't end. First of all it is scientifically verifiable that being a regular at a bar is good for you and society...it makes you social, helps the economy and gets you off Twitter. One thing about the bar scene is if you feel like saying something stupid you can't hide behind an avatar...lots of beer muscles out there. Next, in addition to the benefits we already know, now there is undeniable scientific evidence that wine fights cavities and gum disease, helps clear your skin, aids in weight loss, helps you see better, and It boosts short-term memory. Most importantly, when it comes to living into your 90s, booze actually beats exercise. Researchers have discovered that those who drank moderate amounts of wine and coffee lived longer than those who abstained. Basically speaking, wine is scientifically proven to cure all known societal, medical, and physical ills. Time to get out of the wind, head to the corner bar where everyone knows your name, and uncork a bottle of the good stuff, before your life is Gone with the Wind and say Cheers. And for those of you looking for a companion of the warm blooded variety and a little less croaky, maybe you should listen to  some advice from the Boss...

So you've been broken and you've been hurt
Show me somebody who ain't
Yeah, I know I ain't nobody's bargain
But, hell, a little touchup
and a little paint

You might need somethin' to hold on to
When all the answers, they don't amount to much
Somebody that you could just to talk to
And a little of that Human Touch