Red State, Blue State

It's maddening that spring comes in March in the form of snow Antoinette.

Well it's Monday, and chances are unless you're one of the 12 Loyola Ramblers🏀 you didn't wake up in the best of moods or conditions... and we all know nobody wants to wake up in a Blue State! 🤕There's a good chance many of you who are only Irish ☘one day a year are still feeling the effects of the weekend and are suffering from the dreaded double whammy of St Patrick's Day and Busted Bracket flu🤒. That's the feeling you get after spending the weekend befuddled, boozed up, buzzed, crocked, flushed, flying, fuddled, glazed, groggy, high, inebriated, juiced, laced, liquored up, lit, muddled, plastered, potted, sloshed, stewed, stoned, tanked, tight, tipsy, totaled, wasted or any of the other 3000 synonyms for drunk while looking at your bracket with more red X'S than your last English essay. If you're Irish you are probably ok because they know the cure for excessive alcohol is... you guessed it... more alcohol.🍺 But if not you'll need a reminder that the only 2 scientifically verifiable cures for a hangover are more alcohol (and 3 beef and bean burritos from 7/11), or a bottle of Advil and more alcohol. That's it! Now we all know we have to be careful what we put in our bodies... and Advil is a drug and its very important to pay attention to the RDA. You don't want to overdose. 🤔Instead you want to fill your body with something healthy and escape that Blue State. Follow the allegory of Loyola, who escaped their Blue State and shooting gallery of a city, Chicago, to cross the Red River into a Red State of fame and glory. Hair of the dog will put you on the right path as well, bring a smile to your face and wash away the bitter taste that you picked Virginia to win it all.🙉 The trick here for the healthy conscious is to choose the right beverage... which is of course the healthiest beverage known to mankind, or wo-mankind, or any other kind science(political) deems you to be...Red Wine!🍷 Time to pour yourself a healthy glass of that life giving, age defying, antioxidanting, resveratrol laden, beautifying, body enhancing, mind relaxing, love fortifying, speechifying, dementia preventing, slimifying elixir of the grape! 🍇The varietal is up to you. Don't argue... it's science. And those teetotalers, well they'll just have to suffer. When they wake up that's as good as they are gonna feel all day... the rest of us have a nice cabernet🍷 to look forward to drinking. Speaking of science and the vernal equinox(must have received a red X on my English essay for lack of segue's), tomorrow is the first day of spring so we can do exactly as much day drinking🌄 as night drinking🌃... symmetry!🥂 Of course it's also the first day of spring which is why the forecast is snow ❄for the next two days to help make this the 6th coldest march ever☃️... all because of one thing... global warming!🔥 But don't despair... have plenty of wine on hand 🍾to warm your cockles, or better yet, drink your wine and invite someone special over to warm your cockles, 🙈prepare for another week of March madness... don't worry you probably don't have anything left to lose so just root for the underdogs and drink plenty of wine. Remember this week is also the anniversary of the first rock concert ever, The Moondog Coronation Ball in Cleveland, so  soothe your Blackhearts and Jett over to a bar to watch the Sweet 16 in the Big Dance where they play rock and roll, because...
Next we were movin' on
....singin'
I love rock n' roll
So put another dime in the jukebox, baby
I love rock n' roll
So come an' take your time an' dance with me